Random Favorites (October 2017)

How am I already looking back on October!? Time is flying by, and I am loving every. single. chaotic and exhausting second of this whole motherhood thing! 

Here are some of the favorite moments I captured in October...

Random Favorites (September 2017)

The first few weeks are all a blur, so it is so sweet to look back on the pictures.

Canaan was SO little. 

Shane was SO helpful. 

Everyone was so in love. 

Here are some of my favorites...

Canaan: Two Months

Canaan: One Month

I may be late on posting these pictures, but the good news is that the pictures were taken on time!

Canaan's newborn photo shoot was right around the time he turned 1 month, so be sure to check out those photos here.

Here are some pictures I captured on the camera Shane gave me as a "push present".

Twenty Nine

Oh how I love a birthday. A chance to be surrounded by the people that love you and make you feel special. It is a designated day to celebrate your life and be reminded of all the blessings. This year, I am most thankful for my health and the privilege of being Canaan's mama! I can't wait to see what the future holds! 

Friendsgiving 2017

My heart is so full after spending time with my squad -- the girls that have been there through thick and thin and bring out the best of me every time I see them. This reunion was extra special because three of us have had babies since the last time we were all together. Here is an overhaul of pictures from the special day... and best of all we all vowed to make this an annual tradition! 

Newborn Photo Shoot

Our sweet neighbors gave us a gift certificate for a newborn photo shoot with the incredible Jeannie Collins. We are so grateful for her time and talent, and we will always cherish these captured gems.

We scheduled the photo shoot in advance, and since Canaan arrived early, he was almost 1 month old in these pictures... just a few days shy of his first smile. 

Here are some of my favorites. 

My sweet boy! I wonder if his eyes will stay blue like mine! 

Canaan's Birth Story

It's been a few months since our sweet Canaan arrived, and I wanted to carve out some time between nursing and diapers to update the blog with our birth story. Bottom line is it was truly remarkable. 

Canaan Patrick Michael Clancy

September 3, 2017

6 lbs. 11.9 oz. 

19" long 

Baby & Co. Shower

My dear friend and neighbor, Cass, hosted a wonderful shower for me. We had several more showers following this one, so I invited just neighbors and coworkers to this one. 

The theme was Breakfast at Tiffany's, and it could not have been more fun! 

Here are some pictures ...

Canaan's Storybook Shower

My sisters and Mama did such a great job hosting my baby shower! The theme was adorable with the books correlating with the food.

Here are some pictures...

Canaan Patrick Michael Clancy

Since before we were married, we always loved the name Canaan. At our gender reveal party we found out we were having a boy, but (due to our Trisomy 18 scare) we wanted to wait to name him until we knew he was healthy. 

When we got the good news from the amniocentesis results, I felt sure Shane would be ready to make it official, but he was really reluctant. We considered a few other names, but always came back to Canaan. We wrote our top two names on the mirror in our bathroom, and we practiced saying and writing the names over and over again. Shane even threw darts at a dartboard. Ha!

He is always the one to take his time with decisions, weigh all the options, think things through completely -- and this was no different. It is a lot of pressure naming a child, and when you add the (unwarranted) opinions of others in the mix it can cause doubt. but ultimately we decided to go with the name we have loved all along! 

Around Here Lately...

I am enjoying some free time and relaxation before Baby Boy Clancy rocks our world, so I have not been keeping up with the blog. Here are some pictures to recap the past few months...

We took a trip to Kentucky to go on the Bourbon Trail with our sweet friends Angela & Steve. 

Crib: Before & After

My cousin was so sweet to give us her old crib, and I was thrilled that Shane was willing to refinish it to coordinate with some furniture that he antiqued about 4 years ago. 

It was a quite process, and with Shane's long work hours and terrible commute he had very little time to work on it. It is all finished now, and as I write this post Shane is painting the nursery! 

^^ Before 

Second Trimester Recap

14 weeks - Peach

Baby’s probably thumb sucking and wiggling his toes in there! Baby’s kidneys are making urine, and the liver and spleen are doing their jobs too. And baby’s growing lanugo, a thin, peach-fuzz-like hair, all over—it’ll help keep the body warm!

Baby is as big as a ... lemon

Mama is craving ... a HEALTHY baby boy! (This was during our Trisomy 18 scare) 

& feeling ... shocked that it is a boy!

Health Scare -- Trisomy 18

Edward’s Syndrome is what she called it, and the rest was just a blur. I was sitting at my desk at work the Thursday before our Gender Reveal Shower when the nurse called with results from our Panorama/Natera DNA Panel. The same test results that revealed to the host of the shower that Baby Clancy was a boy also revealed to me that he was high risk (1:32) for Trisomy 18, also known as Edward's Syndrome. The test results are 97% accurate, so our hope for a false positive was very slim.

Symptoms of Tri18 include low birth weight, small abnormally shaped head, and birth defects in organs that are life threatening. Edward’s syndrome has no treatment and is usually fatal before birth or within the first year of life. I was shocked, devastated, desperate for a more definitive answer, but even more desperate for a healthy baby. 

“Now remember, it is a screening, not a diagnostic test”, she said as I sobbed uncontrollably. I locked myself in a conference room with spotty cell service and frantically called Shane. 

Gender Reveal: Baby BOY Clancy

Our dear friends Angela and Steve hosted a gender reveal shower for us on March 11. 

The theme was Wheels or Heels, and the Facebook invitation read: 

Wheels or heels, boots or bows. 

Until March 11th, only the hostess will know! 

By mid-September, Baby Clancy will be in tote. 

Wear pink or blue to the shower to cast your vote. 

Either way, he or she will steal our heart! 

Feel free to bring diapers or baby books to give us a start!

**Brunch starts at 10:30. The reveal is at 11:00 sharp!

Despite having a dream early on that it was a boy, I was completely convinced we were having a girl. 

I didn't really have the mother's intuition feeling per say, but every. single. theory pointed towards girl. Shane believed it was a boy all along -- and he is (almost) always right! 

First Trimester Recap

Wow! The first trimester has flown by! Here is a little recap.

How I Found Out:
Despite all of my Lyme complications, my period still remained very regular. I didn't think for one second I was pregnant, but when I didn't start my period on time I decided to play it safe and get a cheap pregnancy test from the Dollar Store. I was taking medications for my Lyme that could be harmful during pregnancy, so I figured better safe than sorry! On January 4, I went on my lunch break and bought two cheap tests, and I proceeded to take them in the bathroom stall at work. (Not at all where I imagined finding out I would be a mama!) I totally would have waited on Shane had I thought I was about to receive such exciting news. I took the test, and browsed my phone while waiting for the results. I glance over and saw two lines, and said OH S*#! -- I quickly took the second test and sure enough -- another pair of lines appeared! On the way home from work, I stopped by Publix to get a real pregnancy test, and after a few minutes the word PREGNANT popped up on the screen.

How I Told Shane:
I didn't know how to tell Shane, but I knew I didn't want to frantically call him while he was at work which was my initial reaction. So I waited -- an ETERNITY -- well more like a 6 hours until he got home.

Two Red Lines

The pained look from my Lyme symptoms no longer stains my face. Strangers and loved ones alike say I look happier, healthier, and bright. (Their words… not mine!) They say I have glow about me – little do they know it’s because of you. I don’t even know you yet, but I can’t wait to meet you, and hold you and kiss you and THANK YOU!

Trust me when I say, you saved my life. My perspective will never be quite the same. Sweet child of mine, you have been a part of me for just under 8 weeks. You are merely the size of a blueberry but your impact has been nothing shy of profound. You see, before you came along, I was sick. Very sick. I was jaded and felt so betrayed by my own body. It was attacking itself and refusing to heal. I was withering away – I had lost over 20 pounds and the pain – oh the pain I suffered was excruciatingly torturous. And then suddenly, after 18 months of unceasing, unimaginable pain and distress, I felt -- better – for no apparent reason. I was shocked. I thought it was a fluke at first, a much needed break perhaps. I waited on pins and needles in anticipation of the shooting, stabbing pain to return and radiate throughout my body … but it didn’t. The days of relief turned into weeks --- I thought maybe a recent fever I spiked had triggered my immune system and flushed out the bacteria. Or perhaps the warmer weather gave my joints just enough relief for the inflammation to subside. Or maybe the strict anti-inflammatory diet in conjunction with the nerve pain medicine and the steroids was finally doing the trick. I knew it was by the grace of God that I felt healed, but I still wanted some sort of tangible explanation. 

The proof came in the form of two red lines on a Dollar Tree pregnancy test. Make that three cheap pregnancy tests and then the word “PREGNANT” plastered on the side of not one but two of the "expensive tests". I just kept taking tests because I could. not. believe. it! We had been praying for a miracle for quite some time -- but we had no idea it would be you! I was only a day late, but decided to take a test anyway since I was on so much medication that could be harmful to a little baby like you.

The pregnancy hormones are keeping my Lyme symptoms at bay – the same hormones that make me a little grouchy and tired and nauseous  – the ones that are working to provide for and create you -- they are also giving me relief! What a freakin’  miracle. You, my love, ARE a miracle!

At first, we called you our “maybe baby” because we seriously couldn't believe it! Now, your daddy calls you “Sprout” while we toss around baby names. We should find out the gender in just over a month or so, and we will pick your real name then. 

We heard your heartbeat for this first time last week, and it was incredible. You were just a little blurry blob on the screen, but your heartbeat was a strong 150 BPM. We have started sharing this wonderful news with our closest family and friends, but we can’t wait to shout it from the rooftops and blast it all over social media! You are so loved already, and together we will have a pretty awesome life! I’ll teach you what I know, and you’ll help me learn what I don’t. I seriously can’t wait to meet you! 

(written in late January at 7.5 weeks pregnant) 

You Aren't Wealthy Until ...

The new IDS wasn't helpful at all, but they rarely are down here in the South -- at least in my experience. There are so many misconceptions surrounding Lyme disease -- it has been difficult to find someone who knows enough to actually be helpful and also has the bandwidth to accept new patients -- and don't even get me started on insurance. I will admit, this doctor's appointment wasn't nearly as devastating as those in the past, because this was my first appointment that I was symptom free. Oh -- I am still on cloud 9 relishing in every pain-free second! It is one thing to hear a specialist with 30+ years' experience tell you there is nothing he can do when you aren't currently suffering -- it is something completely different when they tell you that and you are suffering from 5-7 severe symptoms a day and have already received the only treatment available.

This disease can be ugly -- it is scary and overwhelming and devastating -- but it has shown me so much beauty. Beauty in others -- like complete strangers that held the door open for me when I didn't have the strength, or the countless number of people that helped me stand up when I couldn't bare the pain on my own. Our support system is filled with the most loyal and loving friends, family and coworkers. My family has been so incredibly supportive, and my husband is hands down sent by the grace of God.

God may not have placed the perfect health care professional in my life (just yet!) -- but he gave me a best friend years ago that later became my husband and vowed to love me in sickness & in health -- and boy did he deliver!

My sweet Shane is the man my parents always prayed I would find -- one that loves me for all of me. He took care of me for days weeks months on end without ever complaining or making me feel ashamed. It was as if he didn't even consider any other option. He avidly researched my symptoms, numerous diseases, supplements and treatments for countless hours. Lifting me in and out of his truck, driving me to a ridiculous number of appointments, carrying me up the stairs, sleeping hand-in-hand with me on the couch when I couldn't muster the strength to even be carried up the stairs, willingly sacrificing sleep, money, social life, work, free-time, himself --- sacrificing EVERYTHING for me. He is the most pure and loving man -- kind and loyal to a fault, and I am forever grateful for his love and dedication!

PS -- He is going to hate me for writing all of this.

Knock On Wood!

Happy New Year! Recently, I have had a random streak of symptom-free days, and I wanted to do a quick post to share this incredible news! I am currently on my 8th day symptom free (knock on wood!) I am so grateful! I have been eating much cleaner recently, but otherwise I have made no other changes. It has been over 2 years since I had more than 3 days symptom-free, so I am just as shocked as the next person, but I will take it! 2017 is off to a great start! Thank you for all the prayers and support.

My next appointment with my new IDS is at the end of January. I will keep you posted. (No pun intended!) :)