Keeping Up With The Clancy's: Sweet Little Gavin

5/29/19
Our sweet little Gavin is just that... little. My regular OB noticed that he was measuring on the smaller side at the 20 week appt, so she referred us to the high risk perinatologist. We made an appointment with the same doctor we saw when we were high risk with Canaan. Ugh - our pregnancies are so dramatic!

The high risk doctor confirmed that anatomically, the baby seems healthy but Gavin is in fact small (10th percentile) - but it is the size of the placenta (not the size of the baby) that is raise for concern. Even if our conception date is off by two weeks, the placenta is still considered small. Although a small placenta can still function properly, other indicators lead the doctor to believe that "it is possible but not probable" that we could carry the baby until full term (37 weeks). He has told us that 28, 30, even 32 weeks is our goal. :( Of course I am just heartbroken knowing that my sweet little Gavin is at risk and the odds are stacked against him in this already cruel and unfair world. I have been told to rest more, eat more protein, take a baby Asprin daily, and I will have an ultrasound every single week from now until delivery to measure my blood pressure, blood flow to the baby, the baby's measurements, amniotic fluid, etc. Luckily, my mom is off this summer and will be available to help with Canaan and things around the house. She is the sweetest Mama and Mimi - she is praying the Rosary for Gavin every single night because "no one knows a mother's heart like Mary".

Shane is as positive and resilient as ever. I know in my heart I should stay positive and hopeful and everything will work out, but it is just so scary! I think things like this impact the mommy and the daddy so differently, but we are committed to being supportive and understanding towards one another which makes a WORLD of difference!

We got this scary news the day before we left for our Florida family vacation, so we were grateful to have a break from reality to process everything. Our next appointment is tomorrow afternoon, and I'll write another update soon after.

I plan to save this post as a draft for now because I feel too vulnerable to put it out there on the big world wide web... hopefully the updates will be more positive in the near future and this will all have been a big scare!

6/6/19
What a roller coaster! Our frequency of ultrasounds has increased from once a week to three times a week so the doctor can keep a close eye on everything. At the appointment following our Florida vacation, the doctor detected abnormal blood flow in the umbilical cord at the sight of the baby. He changed my bed rest from "moderate" to "moderate plus" and explained I should only be moving around for 30 minutes a day and the rest of the time I should be sitting with my feet up or lying down. Bed rest is NOT POSSIBLE with a toddler, so Mimi came to the rescue and has been staying with us all week. She is cooking, and cleaning, and caring for me and running after our wild Canaan, and I could not be more grateful! The bed rest seems to have helped with the blood cord issue for now, but I met with a new doctor yesterday that confirmed that Gavin's growth is restricted due to the placenta and he did not think it was possible to make it to full term. He agreed that 28-32 weeks is a good goal. I am 24 weeks and 2 days right now - so it wont be much longer and this bed rest will turn into trips to the NICU and pumping milk around the clock. I am already mentally preparing myself for needing to leave Gavin at the hospital - I know that will be so devastating, but I pray for his health, the hospital staff caring for him, and his long-term prognosis. We have another appointment tomorrow that will measure Gavin - fingers crossed he has had a big growth spurt! The last measurement he was about 3 weeks behind and just 13 itty bitty ounces!

8/5/19
We are headed into week 11 of bed rest and beyond grateful to have surpassed the doctors expectations and still be pregnant! Our original goal was to make it to 28-32 weeks, and I will be 33 weeks tomorrow. My goal is to spend less than one hour total on my feet each day, and I eat an insane amount of protein to try and gain as much as possible! I've gained 45 lbs so far! Gavin is still measuring about 3 weeks behind, so really every minute he is stable and growing (even at his very slow rate) is a good thing! We have been going to the high risk doctor two (sometime three) times a week for 12 weeks now, and luckily (thanks to the bed rest) everything has been stable up until this past Thursday. They measure Gavin for growth every other week, and Thursday (8/1) was a growth appointment. He has only grown 5 oz. since the last growth check, so Dr. Nathan gave us options to begin considering. We knew the time was coming, but we were still a little shocked to be presented with options of outpatient steroid injections or inpatient monitoring. Dr. Nathan didn't feel as though being admitted to the hospital was necessary at the time, so we decided to hold off and spend another weekend at home resting. Mimi normally comes on Sunday evenings and heads back home on Friday afternoons, but my dad came this past weekend to help tag-team Canaan so Shane could cross some stuff off the to-do list. I am so thankful for my parents' support during this time - I honestly don't know what we would do without them!

I will be 33 weeks tomorrow, and the next growth check is at 34 w 2 d. Fingers crossed that everything stays stable until at least then!

A friend text me today asking what else we need off our registry, and even though I sent her a few suggestions I told her all we really want is a big, healthy, NICU-free September baby! Each night when I go to sleep, I rest my hand over Gavin and repeat, "You are strong,. You are resilient. You have a purpose in this world, and despite the odds against you, you are a fighter." I repeat it over and over until I fall asleep!

Here are some of our ultrasound pictures along the way: